"

*Hits blunt*

How does a blind person know when to stop wiping their ass?

"

witchomo:

lordemusic:

hate:

im only 17 and ive already had like 3 mid-life crises

lol me

ok lorde you’ve also been nominated for nearly 3 grammys at the age of 17

the-gingerdancer:

papayadog:

scandalous

 i will reblog this as many times as it takes me to stop finding this funny

(Source: yousaytheydontcare)

shouldnt:

Ariana Grande sounds like a font on Microsoft Word

gaaraofsburbia:

applecranberry:

ruraljackdaw:

thetowndrugdealer:

*sucks guys dick*
*dies of nut allergy*

did you know that proteins in brazil nuts can be transmitted sexually so if someone had an allergy and the guy had eaten brazil nuts then they could literally suck dick and die of a nut allergy

now I do

(Source: thetowndrugdealer)

shouldnt:

the-misadventures-of-lele:

fileformat:

READ THAT BITCH FOR F I L T H

DAMN FRANCINE WENT INNNNNN

OMG SHIT

(Source: whisperintoass)

supersmashthestatebros:

okay, I lied. I don’t have my license to kill, but I do have my learner’s permit. as soon as my mom gets here, you’re toast.